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我爱你，有错吗？
It's ridiculously pointless, closing the night the tears. But when night falls, darkness soon envelopes us. And I won't feel the cozy atmosphere to sleep, only to know, there's fear that's surrounding me. And when I'm nocturnal at night, I get haunted. Haunted by you, the upcoming worries, wild thoughts, the paranoid mind, everything.Don't it seem scary, in the pitch darkness, you can't see anything. It's similar to being blind. Ahead of you, it's just complete darkness, no glimmer of light, nothing at all. I can understand how those blind feel, having no sense of direction, insecurities around, using their other senses to move around, having no assertion from others, no idea what's coming right in front of them; all alone, only can depends on themselves, using their intuitions to direct them. It's funny to say that, isn't it like life? We don't know what's coming up next, we don't have the beacon of light in front of us to lead us to the right place, right decisions, all depends on our own. We can't differentiate what's right and wrong, who's true and who's fake, who loves us and who doesn't, who hate us and who like us. Isn't it frustrating, when reality finally strikes you, and then you learnt that actually those who're always with you are the ones that dump you first, whereas those that never once you thought would care slowly comes into your life? What is this.. Some kinda life manipulating games huh? Sorry but I'm not fit to play it alright. My past was a mistake, my future is gonna be bliss, I hope. And my present, I'm still waiting for it to happen..
It's really tiring to live such a stereotype life, where you keep encountering the same problems, and no matter how hard you try to overcome it, the results you get is still the same. The worst is, there isn't anyone motivating and cheering you on, you have to face it all by yourself. But I like how the night makes me fall into deep sleep. When I thought I wasn't able to, shut my eyes, think, and think and the next moment I open my eyes, it's already morning. I think this is a good thing, well brings away all my troubles for a some time, I don't mind facing it again cos' least I had some time not to mull over it. Maybe, this is blessing in disguise..? To be honest, so many countless things had happened, and I guess, my judgement is right. Those that I think are true, are indeed true, those I think are phony, yeah, fuck off and get a life man.
When I can't take it, I'm serious about pulling a trigger at you. Since everything has changed, I guess it's time to play the game with another strategy.
Posted on Monday, November 21, 2011 @ 12:57 PM